Revision

I am sorry about my last post. Seems it triggered a great deal of worry. For that, I am apologizing. Not for the post itself. Honestly, I feel that way a lot more often than I ever let on, so, really it’s nothing new. I think Kerber captured me nearly perfectly in her comments. My sage friend wrote the following:

I adore both the Kool-Aid drinking, [air popped] popcorn-eating, old-TV- show-watching, depressed woman who won’t leave her room; as much as I love my bubbly laughing friend!

A sad portrait? Perhaps. Nevertheless, she’s right on the money. I am alternately a very upbeat, giggly, outgoing person and a shy, retreating, anxiety-ridden hermit (who just so happens to love Nick at Nite).

So, I titled this post “Counterpoint” because I am going to make a list of things — free association style — that make me happy:

• Annabelle’s laugh and the way she smiles at me in the morning when she first sees me.
• Friends who badger me into attending Panhellenic meetings with them, thereby forcing the hermit to come out and play.
• Dr. Pepper-flavored Jelly Bellys.
• My sister.
• Taking a long drive while listening to music at a very unreasonable volume.
• “Office Space.”
• Knowing my husband will be in town soon.
• Having parents and in-laws who love me: Hermit or Bubbly
• XM Radio.
• Lying in Andre’s arms at 4 a.m. listening to Annabelle babble.
• Swimming pools.
• Knowing I have friends who know the bubbly Neen.
• The following poem, which a friend wrote for me:
  To know a Neen
  Is a wonderful thing.
  To know a Neen
  Makes me laugh and sing.

• Rush’s Hold Your Fire.
• Pretty much anything with Chris Farley in it.
• Lipgloss!
• Every novel by Ivan Turgenev.
• Crisp autumn nights.
• Talking all-night on the phone with a good friend even though we’re 35 and just saw each other yesterday.
• Driving through the middle of nowhere Texas and smelling barbecue.
• Sam and Frodo’s unfailing friendship.
• Hockey and all that entails (goalie masks, power plays, fighting, slap shots, goal horns, the other team’s penalties, short-handed goals, Marian Hossa, hat tricks, Andre in his hockey jerseys, cold arenas, the Zamboni, break aways, 5-on-3s, penalty shots, changing on the fly, the red light, feisty goalies, shootouts, Darcy Tucker, hip checks, etc.)
• Skiing through a deserted glade when someone somewhere else on the mountain cries out in glee.
• Sarah.
• Dancing With the Stars
• Magazines.
• My Slava Kozlov card.
• Virtual friends.
• Three’s Company.
• Dos Mas (still crazy after all these years!).
• Ringing my parents and always hearing the same greeting, “Hi sweet angel.”

All of the above are gifts from God. I know I have a great deal to be thankful for and I know I shouldn’t be depressed. I am working on that…